My Tiny Love

My daughter brings so much joy into my life on a daily basis.

When I went to get her this morning from her crib she grabbed her bunny and her lamb, shut off her rain forest soother and held her arms out wide for me! When I picked her up I gave her a big kiss that she didn't flinch from. And then, on the way to the living room, she gave me a kiss! This is a rare thing, so I relished in it. I tried to get another kiss from her, but I was approached by her turning her head and pushing away from me to get down. It was worth it.

She talked with Sassy Auntie Caroline on the internet today. She wanted to understand why I was wearing headphones so I let her try them on. She listened intently to what Caroline was saying and she waved to her! She didn't want to get off and was very mad when I took it away.



Then this afternoon as Ernie was mowing the lawn, I decided that we needed some fresh air too. So, I got some bug spray on us and we went down to the garden. I looked around for some fresh veggies to pluck while Sophie crawled around. I usually don't let her crawl around in the grass/dirt for fear she will eat dirt or something containing protein and 6 legs.

Low and behold I turn my head and see her spitting out dirt. All I could do was laugh because it was so funny and cute to see ehr discover something new. Even though it was unpleasant for her (and me) she moved onto discovering more weeds and clumps of dirt.

And even though she gets mad at me for keeping her out of the garbage, taking away the pizza sauce packet she found in the cupboard, and not letting her hold the phone the whole time I'm on it, I wouldn't change her for the world. Every little precious thing she does, no matter how tiny, makes my heart melt.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

She's finally down. Hold on a minute, let me take a deep breath. I swear my sweet angel baby girl drives me nuts sometimes. She is so inconsistent with her sleep patterns. As soon as we get into a routine she changes it. I think she thinks it's hilarious.

She was on the boob from about 2 hours until she went to bed at 10pm. I think she may be going through a growth spurt. I hope bedtime will get easier as we introduce solids next month. When I'm feeding her at night I feel like I am being held down and can't move. I love her, obviously, but having to sit down for that long drives me nuts. I feel a slight panic attack coming on sometimes.

On the other hand, I am not ready to have her on cereal. I mean I can't wait to see her with the food all over her face. And all the weird little expressions she will make when she's trying new things out. But it's a huge step into not being my infant anymore. And I'm just not comfortable enough with that. Before I know it, she will be leaving for college and never looking back.

I guess for now I will soak in as much of her as possible and be severely thankful to have her in my life. And that I get to see her grow into a smart, strong and self knowing woman.

Just thinking about her makes me want to pick her up out of bed and snuggle her. I must be nuts to put myself through trying to get her back to sleep again tonight!